The 10 Worst Films of 2007

These are the 10 worst films released in 2007 that I've had the displeasure of viewing. Avoid at all costs.

10. Good Luck Chuck



You would think that image alone would make the film worth watching, huh? Try again. Alba's the endearing equivalent of a baboon and the romance doesn't work because it's between two unlikeable characters. Delivers a few laughs, but Alba's train wreck of a character single-handedly ruined it for me.

9. American Pie Presents: Beta House



By far the worst of the "sequels." The storyline feels so rehashed and idiotic that I was even bored by the nudity. And there was plenty of it.

8. Cougar Club



In a nutshell? Two idiots get the opportunity to make money by starting a cougar club (a club devoted to older women wanting to pay for young boy toy sex). Throw in a cliché annoying girlfriend and overdone genre plot tactics, and there ya have it.

7. The Haunting Hour: Don’t Think About It



Don't ask me why I watched this. I was a rabid Goosebumps fan as an adolescent and I tried to recreate some of that magic by watching this. Not an entirely bad movie... if you're a six year old. Tobin Bell makes a memorable cameo, though.

6. Across the Universe



About as much structure as diarrhea. The cinematic waste of time of the year, that is so pointless and self-aware I don't remembering cringing more in a single film... ever. I do give it props for maybe one or two (of about 20) well done covers of The Beatles songs, and for some pretty interesting visuals.

5. License to Wed



Not interesting. Not funny.

4. Shrek the Halls



This film gets such a high placement because, for it's short running length (a little over 20 minutes), it managed to bore me to tears. The Shrek series has been on a steady decline since it's first 2001 release, and there is no reason that a 20 minute version should be the least watchable. More Donkey dumbness, more Shrek getting angry, more stupid pointless accidents, yawn. For shame.

3. Norbit



Norbit the character is so expressionless, bland and uninteresting that I have to wonder why Murphy did this. His performance as Norbit's wife Rasputia was mildly entertaining and surprisingly realistic, but the overall quality of the story, characters and humour was unforgivably poor.

2. Hostel: Part II



Takes the term "exploitative" to a new low. I'm a fan of the first one, but this disgraceful, sick piece of trash is not watchable on any level. And even outside the gratuitous gore and dismemberment, the "plot" is about as intuitive as spit.


However, no film released in 2007 was less watchable than...

1. Dead Mary



Okay, I will be honest. This film is probably better overall than a few other titles on this list. However, it takes the crown as my least favourite film of 2007 for having the single most incompetent ending of a film this decade. The ending makes so little sense (and not in a deep way) that I was amazed at how such a bad movie could get so much worse in it's final 2-3 minutes. My choice for the worst film '07 had to offer.

© 2008 Kim Bartlett